Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Dear Bitches from HS...

Dear Bitches from High School (you know who you are),
I feel sorry for you. I watch you waste away your lives despertately trying to continue to be as "cool" as you were in high school. I have news for you...it's not working. You were not cool in high school. You were mean, stuck up, and slutty. Since most people weren't willing to tell this to you to your face, you continued to assume that everyone's resentment towards you was jealousy. I can assure you, it was not. Sadly, you're just as much a waste of oxygen as you were back then. Do you honestly think that partying like you're 18 when you're almost 30 is making something of your life?
And while I've put forth a great deal of effort in distancing myself from the likes of you as soon as I had the opportunity, I still somehow have the joy of being presented with your shallow lives via mutual friends on FB. And yet, I can't help but be thankful...you slutty, slutty pirates. Grow the fuck up.

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